Thursday, April 26, 2012

Letter Three.


It's about time for another letter. 



Mom and Dad, 
I'm not sure when exactly it was that I realized that you were the best parents I could have asked for.  But.  Somewhere along the line, I transitioned from thinking that parents punish their kids because they hated them, to realizing that you're two of the wisest people I know.
Thanks for teaching me to love.  An honest, unconditional love that I try to live out.  Thanks for teaching me to listen.  Thanks for teaching me patience.  Thanks for helping me realize that life isn't all about me, but that occasionally, I have to do some things for my sanity.  Thanks for standing in awe over my talents- whether it be that first grade piece of 'art' with mom in her Cherokee sweatshirt, or whether it be the first time I came home and showed you how to add letters.  Thanks for supporting me in all that I do.  Thanks for understanding.  I honestly can't think of a time where you've not understood or when you've not let me explain until you understood.  Thanks for making sacrifice after sacrifice for me.  Thanks for taking me camping.  Thanks for teaching me that helping out around the house won't kill me.  Thanks for teaching me what's fair, and the fact that life isn't always.  Thanks for letting me paint my rooms bright colors.  Thanks for providing my friends a loving place to hang out.  Thanks for teaching me that 'modest is hottest', and that wearing sunscreen is a good idea.  Thanks for giving me saltines and 7up with every tummy-ache.  Thanks for teaching me to ride a bike.  Thanks for always detecting the 'fuzzy eye'.  Thanks for making me laugh all the time.  Thanks for letting me cry for no reason -if that's what I need.  Thanks for making me dirt-cake for all my birthdays.  Thanks for making pizza dough with me.  Thanks for letting me come grocery shopping and throw unnecessary items in the cart.  Thanks for teaching me to floss.  Mostly, thanks for raising me with the values you did.  Thanks for not sheltering me, but instead, being able to trust me.  Thanks for stressing the points of honesty, trust, patience, and respect.  Those are big ones. 
Anyways.  I could go on forever.  So.  Thanks for all the love you've given me.  Sorry for the 'troubles' I've caused and the arguments I've instigated.  Thanks for loving me so incredibly unconditionally.  

P.S. Thanks for the blue eyes

Love always,
Baby Jane

Monday, April 23, 2012

Mike Chadwick.

Thanks to Kelly Rae's recital, I've had "Who Are We Fooling?" by Brooke Fraser stuck in my head for days.  First.  Kelly Rae is absolutely amazing.  The most beautiful voice hands down I have ever heard.  Second.  Caleb proposed.  And she said yes.  And it was beautiful.  Third.  These song lyrics by Brooke Fraser blew my mind.  "We both agreed on where we should go., but not how to get there."... "If it's not either of us tell me who are we fooling?"  Really though.  Look up the song.  And the lyrics.  


In other news, I finally bought 'The Ugly Truth'.  It's okay.  You can judge me if you'd like.  I'm aware that it's not the most 'fruitful' movie.  But I sure do love it.  Mostly because it's just good, but partially because I relate to it a little bit. And Mike Chadwick in the form of Gerard Butler is a personal potential dream boat float of mine.  Sorry if that didn't make sense.  Sometimes that's what happens when I withhold thoughts.  


Lots of randoms today:
  • The last several episodes of Grey's have been so wonderful.  Emotionally grand.  
  • I really need to get my guitar back out.  Tune it.  And play it.  
  • I could go for a nice long bike ride with my daddio right about now.  
  • Rats teeth never stop growing.  That's why they grind them.  (Thanks Jules). 
  • Em's art show is the Sunday!!! I'm so pumped!
  • Tea is my new coffee.  At least I think so. 
  • This mix on 8tracks is my new favorite:   http://8tracks.com/123music456/exams-are-life-ruiners-they-ruin-people-s-lives
  • I came across this quote by Edgar Allen Poe: "And being so young and dipped in folly, I fell in love with melancholy."  Now, I'm not ashamed at the fact that I often google words.  My vocabulary isn't the largest.  Anyways.  Melancholy has an even more negative connotation than I thought.  "Sadness or depression of the spirits. Gloom".  I just always assumed it meant more on the lines of 'mellowly contemplative'.  Guess not. 
  • This is for Nikweeta.  I know she likes Maya. 




Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Bernhoft.

I don't often dish out thoughts on relationships.  But I feel like it.  So I will.  First- my disclaimer: My thoughts switch a lot.  And where my thoughts are right now haven't always been and definitely won't always be.  And my thoughts definitely don't stand for everyone.
'Being with someone' sounds so complicated right now.  I think a lot of people are naive about relationships and how much work and commitment a good actual relationship takes.  How long can a relationship last without substance?  ... Not very.
I've come to realize that I'm really weird and I've got a lot of quirks. [Cue music: "The best kind of girl... is a quirky girl"] But really- weird isn't always the easiest to love.  So why does it make sense to search for somebody to love you and all the weird things about you?  That's not something that you can force on someone.  It's their choice.  Just like it's your choice to love someone and all they 'entail'.
Anyways.  That's just my two boring cents on that.  



In other news, I'm addicted to One Tree Hill.  Yes.  I'm emotionally attached to fictional characters and bad acting but I am not ashamed.  I'm now on Season 2.  The acting is getting progressively better.  I have hope for the future seasons.  Anyways.  I'd marry Lucas Scott if I could.  And I'm mad at Haley for breaking Nathan's heart. 


Randoms:
-Thursday night I get to watch 3 hours of the Voice with Nikweeta.  That'll get me through a few days.  

-When tabacco and coffee were starting to be imported back in the day, the verdict was out on how 'safe' coffee was.  People saw it as a potentially dangerous stimulant.  Could you imagine if coffee would have been a 'drug'? 
-This video is awesome. 

Thursday, April 12, 2012

A Day In The Life.

Normally, if you'd ask me what's gone through my brain in the past ten minutes, I would most often tell you ... "a lot".  Anyways.  I realized that my thoughts were starting to trample over each other.  I would think of something.  Then I'd think of something else. Like.. "This would be a nice thing to do for this person" or.. "Oh. That'd be a good thing to look into to do for my life." But.. then I keep thinking of other things., and all of my thoughts get trampled.  I'd say.. about 67% of them.  So. I decided to try to not neglect my poor thoughts for a day and commit to writing down whatever nonsense came to my head. Or at least some of it.  
So. This is what I got. (And I warn you., some thoughts seem to disconnected. My brain is a strange place): 
"They had nothing but the people of God and the word of God. And strangely that was enough." Jackson said that in chapel. Loved it.
Next, I think I was accused of being too complex.  I was slightly insulted and because.., I do my best to live a fairly simple life.  Maybe someday I'll be convicted to be more simple and own all of three shirts.  Oh well.  We'll see what God tells me.
I've always felt awkward about fist pumps/hand shakes.  How do you react? Everyone does them a different way.  Is it a fist pump? Is it a hand shake?  Is it a fistpump-handshake-combo? Just awkward.
Then. I go into work, which leads me to the union for coffee.  I'm still thinking about this 'simplicity' thing.  How simple am I really?  Simple 'enough'?  Compared to what though?  People's standards?  My standards?  God's standards?  Anyways. I know black coffee would be the most simple.  But.  I don't like it that way.  Vanilla syrup.  Surely that's more simple than caramel or hazelnut right?  Then sugar.  Which reminds me of how I prefer actual sugar as opposed to artificial sweeteners.  Then I was reminded of what Blakeley told me about artificial sweeteners living in fat cells and creating new homes when they don't have enough fat cells to live in.  Gross.  Then I was reminded of a Condescending Wonka that says "You drink Diet soda? You must be so healthy."  Ha.  Anyways.  Then I pay for my coffee and I thank Union John for putting in the literal two cents so I can have even dollar change yet again.  And I hope that when I tell him to have a good day he knows that I sincerely mean it.

And. That leads us to about 10am.  So I'll stop because that's already a lot of rambles.

Anyways.  Embishop gave me this picture.  And I obviously love it.  






Thursday, April 5, 2012

This Little Guy.

I made the excellent decision of skipping class and sleeping in this morning.  Then I took my time and made an egg sandwich on a bagel and a side of coffee.  Now I'm finishing off an episode of Celebrity Apprentice as I wait til the last minute to head for Spanish.  Then it's Prob and Stats time, and then it's time to hit the road.  Jules and I are headed to stay at Blake's tonight!  Then tomorrow, I get to see my sister.  I haven't seen her since January!  On Saturday, my parents get back from Florida, which happens to be my dad's birthday.  Sunday will be Easter mixed with birthday celebrations.  Also.  I'm so excited to see this lil puppy of mine.   4.5 pounds of pure cuteness and love.
Sorry I have no other thoughts that the fact that I'm so excited to go home.  But. That's simply all I can think about.  Wisconsin here I come!